Saturday, March 27, 2010


Just a quick shoulder update:
Surgery went well on the 17th. Have NOT liked the heavy pain meds, so I re-wrote my medication plan resulting in a clearer head and a bit more pain.

However, everyday the pain is a little less and my mobility a little more. It's the little things that gage my progress. While I still can't brush my teeth with my right hand, I can barely get my eyeliner on using my right hand, but only on the bottom eyelid. Most of the time I can use both hands to pull my pants up, although it takes a good bit longer than normal. Still no diaper changing or picking up my babies.....missing that the most, I'd say. But I have been mastering the skill of eating with my left hand, washing my hair with my left hand and a bit of writing with my left hand, all of which I am told, will sharpen my mind. I would have rather kept it on the dull side or mastered another skill instead. Oh, well.

Thanks goes out for all the meals, prayers, cards, calls, etc. I have been overwhelmed with love and support!


It sure doesn't take much, these days, for one's MO ("mode of operation") to become outdated. As you can tell, from the bland visuals of my blog, I don't invest much time in the bells and whistles of technology. But, boy, are there some great tools out there! My problem? Making time to learn how to use them!

Yes, I am one of the few left in the U.S. who searches out the 35mm film for out old, faithful Minolta camera. We purchased this camera shortly after we were married. Yet, still, without fail, after snapping a few pics of the kiddos, one of them asks "can I see it?" as they crane their neck around in search of an lcd to receive their instant gratification. My husband has been trying to talk me into getting a digital camera for a couple years now. I stubbornly argue that it has taken me years to find a manageable rythmn of memory keeping via photo: my camera dates the picture, I get the generic prints from Target with a digital cd, the photos get into an album in a [usually] timely manner and, voila, my kids have a collection of albums to pull of the shelf and take a stroll down memory lane. The thought of adding extra steps into that process is enough to cause me to dig my heels least for now. Maybe once the youngest 2 kiddos get potty-trained, then I will consider re-writing my rythmn.

Priorities.....sigh.....all about seasons.....

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Striving to Rest

Today is the day of surgery. As I continue to hold out for a miraculous healing, I'm reflecting on all that I've learned so far on this journey.

It has been amazing to observe my own spirit and soul and to find myself striving for healing. How does one do that exactly? I'm not really sure, but I know I am! I know that there are spiritual laws that we live and breathe by, many of which are likely still undiscovered. Also, I know that we are responsible for the revelation we have received. So after "doing" all I know to do to align my spirit with His, I just have to rest and receive, right? Sounds pretty easy which is precisely why I have been amazed at just how much striving I have entered into in this "restful wait".

Jesus has been hearing my prayers and overwhelming me with a deeper revelation of just how much He loves and delights in me, just for me! So when I remind myself of these truths, I take a deep breath and exhale a sigh of relief.

It is so important as we ask, pray and believe for breakthrough of any kind, that we only allow ourselves to hope in Him! In the past I have found myself putting my expectations and hopes in a desired outcome. And, as you can imagine, if that outcome is not achieved, I am disappointed. Jesus never changes! His love and goodness is unending! The "outcome" of His character is sure and steadfast. It's a much more encouraging, faith-building pursuit to hope ONLY in Him!

Friday, March 12, 2010

The Greater Lesson

Well, I'm scheduled to have surgery on my shoulder this Wednesday. It seems I have a bone spur: the source of a lot of pain over the past 8 months. Many prayers have gone up on my behalf since the diagnosis and as a result, my shoulder feels about 85% back to normal. Yay, God!

The girls are praying fervently, especially my little intercessor, Seraphina (hence the name). She lays hands on me almost daily and says "we just put healing on mommy in the name of Jesus!" Bring it on Lord!

I mentioned to my husband what an awesome altar of remembrance a healing miracle would be for the children to have built into their revelation of Jesus at such a young age. But, it would also be just as powerful of an opportunity if I still have to have surgery, but am able to testify to them that God is ALWAYS good and ALWAYS loving. To be able to tell them "I don't know why mommy still has to have surgery, but you can talk to Jesus about it. He knows why.", could be a statement leading to some powerful revelation that would grow me too! They can hear Him so clearly and confidently at this young age!

Much of this healing stuff remains a mystery to me. It brings me much peace, however, to be able to rest in the knowledge that God does not inflict anyone with sickness, tragedy, or disease. He loves me and He wants to heal me! Some things I understand why they happen, most I do not. Ah, but my Daddy takes good care of me ALWAYS and in His love I am secure (most days :-) May my children discover an even greater security in His unfathomable love, no matter what the outcome of my shoulder situation.